Not everything is easy...

Man has this winter been putting me to the test. I've never been much of a winter fan and this one is just another winter to add to the list of shitty winters. I feel like I've lost myself this year, I was in such a better state of being last year and one could almost say I had a good winter, but this year it's the same old story: Depressed because I'm not where I wanted to be in the end of the year.  I feel like I've fallen into pieces and everything else has shattered with me. 

So with all that said my New Years resolution is to focus on me... Again. Get myself back to the happy, goofy Christie that so many miss. Next year will be about my health both physically and mentally. I'm going to be 24 years old in a few days and I'm no where near where I thought I would be when growing up. Sure I've got a full time job and just recently got medical insurance because of that, and I'm move out of my parents house, but I thought I would have at least graduated from college and had a career or at least a degree. I thought maybe I would be engaged or married with kids, that's no where near in my future. I thought I would be happy with the person I became, proud to be myself but I don't even know who I am. 

Many changes are to come next year and well I'm actually quite excited to see where I'll be next year at this time. I think it's the first time ever that I'm not just afraid for these changes but eager... It's just a matter of time until I start making my moves and baby my movement is forward so either hop on or be left in the dust.